A Not-So-Brief Meditation on Compliments

One of the best compliments I’ve ever received is that I am a genuine person. OK, fine, you got me. So maybe it came from a somewhat drunk girl who I had known for less than 24 hours, but it was one of the nicest things anyone’s ever said to me (is that sad?) and I still haven’t forgotten about it. And so what if she was drunk?! Drunk words are sober thoughts, are they not? I’ve been telling myself this, anyway, so please don’t answer that question. It is so obviously true.

It’s funny because she probably just tossed it out there in her befuddled state as her blood turned into goon (remember, the cheap Aussie boxed wine) and didn’t think much of it. And I will never see her again and she has probably since thrown that compliment out to many other people, but I don’t care. Regardless of how GENUINE the compliment was on her end, it meant a lot to me. So thank you, drunken British friend that I had the pleasure of meeting on one fateful trip to Fraser Island, your intoxicated words meant more than you will ever know!

Now here’s the thing: I’m really bad at taking compliments. I find it so awkward and uncomfortable, particularly if it’s about a physical trait. Of course it’s kind and flattering and deep down might boost my self esteem a little, but it’s so hard for me to just say thank you and accept it… it just feels unnatural. But a compliment towards who I am as a person really meant a lot to me and didn’t make me roll my eyes and make a stupid, ugly face as I usually would to avoid accepting it. Instead, I felt comfortable saying thank you and letting myself soak in the kind words that warmed me up even more than the goon ever could (although it’s very possible that my own consumption of goon that evening led me to accept the compliment more willingly than I normally would, but I’d like to think that only played a minor role).

It probably seems like such a tiny, insignificant thing to feel so flattered by, and maybe it is, but it just goes to show how much more meaningful a compliment about someone’s inner self is than one regarding their appearance. Not that those aren’t nice too, but we can’t control what we look like, (unless you’re a Kardashian) however, we can control the kind of person we are and how we speak and act towards others, so it’s much more touching being told you have a beautiful heart than a beautiful exterior.

OK, you’re all probably thinking ‘Wow, all she said was that you were a genuine person. She didn’t say you had a beautiful soul and a heart of gold. Relax!’ And you’re right. I’m talking up this minor compliment waaaay too much here. Maybe being genuine isn’t even that great of a thing?? Maybe she didn’t even mean it in such a sincere, heart-warming way?? I’ll never know. But what I do know is just how much it impacted me in a positive way!

I’m sharing all this cheesy, vomit-worthy crap to make the point that it’s always good to spread love and kindness whenever you get the chance and that you should always tell someone when you have a nice thought about them. No one ever receives a compliment and thinks ‘oh, I wish she/he hadn’t said that.’ No one! Well, there may be a few exceptions, like if it’s a creepy old man making an uncomfortable comment that only he thinks is flattering… Or something else gross like that, in which case you very well might be wishing he hadn’t said it. But other than that… compliments are good!

I know I’ve been talking about compliments that are aimed at a person’s personality or inner self or whatever other spiritual way you want to label it, but even if you want to give someone a more “superficial” compliment, I think you should go ahead and do it! Tell that person how nice they look! How cute their new haircut is! Whatever it is, if it’s nice, tell them! And if it’s a compliment that goes deeper than the surface, you should most definitely tell them! I think the world would be a brighter place if we actually said it out loud whenever we had a kind thought about one another rather than keeping it to ourselves. (Corny corn corn, I know. I’m not used to being so cheesy and thoughtful on the interwebz, it’s gross.)

So although I personally can’t take a compliment to save my life, we all know that it’s nice to hear that someone appreciates you in some way. So go on and tell someone special just how special they are… because heck, nothing bad can come from it! They may scrunch up their nose, go cross-eyed, make their upper lip disappear into a creepy, toothy grin while wiggling their tongue like a lizard (my personal fave way to react when someone says something nice about my appearance… do you still think I look good now??? Didn’t think so. Please move along so I can feel special deep down as I process your kind words without having to awkwardly accept the compliment as if I agree with it. My god, is that really frickin weird??? I just realized how weird that is. Ugh. Why am I this way?) BUT a little compliment goes a long way.

So yeah… next time you think a nice thought about someone, say it out loud. Unless it’s about me, in which case maybe just send a text from across the room if you want to tell me you like my hair or something. That way I can just respond with a casual ‘thanks’ while hiding behind my screen without any awkward human interaction involved. That is assuming you have something nice to say about me, not that I think I am worthy of compliments or anything. But if you think I am ugly or a bad person, maybe don’t tell me. I am very sensitive! I am a Pisces, after all, what do you expect?! And maybe treat everyone you meet as though they are a Pisces as well, because they probably will be hurt too if you say something mean about them (but remember they have no legitimate excuse to be upset if they’re not a Pisces. Astrological signs are extremely accurate and the only way to properly determine a person’s traits and sensitivity threshold).

I hope you all know that 99% of what I write is sarcastic… if you haven’t figured that out by now… bless your soul.

Well, this has been sufficiently weird. I’m sure you all agree. You may now go back to your normal lives and I apologize immensely for this odd, disorganized, repetitive, sort of unserious yet uncomfortably deep mish mash of thoughts. If you made it this far, I am impressed. The point is: be nice and tell people when you think nice things about them. That is all.

Au revoir, my valued blog readers and random web surfers who had the misfortune of stumbling upon my blog today.

Tal